The Couch Power 10, Week 8
There's much to not like about the current landscape of college sports, perhaps college football in particular, and I'm far from the only one saying it. But before you come at me with pitchforks, know that my gripe is not with the kids being able to make money off of themselves or being able to transfer willy-nilly; at least not my chief gripe. My chief gripe has been the absurd conference realignment over the last decade, exacerbated in the last couple years by money-hungry commissioners and broadcasters. There is absolutely no reason for UCLA (yes, the L.A. stands for Los Angeles) to be in the same conference as Maryland, whose campus is about 5 stops on the Metro from my house in Washington D.C.
And yet. And yet. Much like how FIFA's endless corruption is enabled by how good their main product (the World Cup) is, I have to admit... the college football puppet-masters have given us one hell of a regular season. I can suspend my cynicism when I watch BYU and Iowa State both keep their perfect seasons afloat with last-minute touchdowns against Oklahoma State and UCF, respectively; I don't need to question what all those teams are doing in the Big 12. I can watch Miami pull out another road thriller, this time over Louisville, two weeks after doing the same at California, and momentarily forget about the preposterousness of those three teams all being in the same conference. I can marvel at SMU's continued impressive season and allow myself only a small chuckle when I read "dominated ACC foe Stanford." And I can forget, for a few blissful hours, that Texas has only recently become an SEC team as I watch an absolutely pulsating atmosphere in Austin slowly regain belief and then fizzle out again as the #1 Longhorns get draxxed sklounst by new conference-mates, #5 Georgia. There were, of course, some traditional conference clashes to counterbalance the new era: Duke continued Florida State's misery, Illinois did the same to Michigan, and Tennessee upset Alabama with some late heroics on both sides of the ball.
Just a refresher, in case you forgot: this is not a definitive ranking on how good the teams are, or on who I think will be/deserves to be in the playoff at the end of the year. Rather, it's more of a "What if preseason rankings and bigwig bias didn't predetermine the top teams" kind of thing, an ideal ranking of the country's teams based on what they've actually proved on the field to date. Don't be mad cuz I'm doin' me better than you doin' you:
1. Oregon
The Ducks bucked Big Ten tradition by following up their massive win over Ohio State, not with an immediate stunning loss at Purdue, but instead a dominant road win on a short turnaround. Yes, Purdue is awful, but flying across the country to shut out a conference opponent by 5 touchdowns in their home stadium just 5 days after winning one of the biggest games of the season is mighty impressive. Residual Pac-12 bias will likely prevent many from believing Oregon is truly the best team in the country, and who knows? All that matters is that with Texas’s loss, they are the sole team in the country with multiple wins over ranked teams AND a flawless record.
2. Georgia
I had a working theory that Georgia’s 1st half at Alabama was a fluke— a combination of the moment being too big for a pretty young defense and the home team doing every single thing right off of pure adrenaline —and the team that came all the way back to nearly win in the 2nd half was the real Georgia. I’ll admit, that belief was a little wobbly amidst less-than-great showings vs. SEC cellar-dwellers Kentucky and Mississippi State, but now having absolutely dominated 5 out of 6 halves of primetime, “game of the week” football, I think we have enough evidence that this is a great team. Normally I would have reservations about jumping a team with a loss up to #2 over so many remaining unbeaten, but look when you’ve played the hardest schedule in the country, just beat the #1 team at their place, and your sole loss is on a last-minute touchdown at Alabama? Exceptions can be made.
3. BYU
BYU came unbelievably close to losing their perfect season at home, and did slip in the strength of record ratings thanks to big weeks from other teams. But guess what? They didn’t lose, and they’re still a Top 4 resume in the country, per ESPN. Besides, while the optics of losing at home to an unranked team would have been bad, Oklahoma State is a far, far better team than their record denotes, and the fact that the Cougars pulled out a miracle win sort of suggests they might be in for a magical season. The key now will to be to avoid a classic trap game scenario after an emotional win, as they travel to a UCF team that almost beat another undefeated Big 12 team on Saturday.
4. Penn State
A bye week for Penn State, who was likely grateful for the rest before they travel to Wisconsin and then host Ohio State in a conference clash extraordinaire. It was a mixed bag for the Nittany Lions’ body of work: their latest win at USC looks significantly less impressive, given the Trojans’ 4th consecutive Big Ten loss, this one to Maryland. But conversely, Illinois’ big upset over Michigan keeps the Illini in the Top 20, giving Penn State a bona fide signature win thus far thanks to their Week 4 victory over Bret Bielema’s side.
5. Texas
Last week, I mentioned that Texas’s wins over Michigan and Oklahoma may not turn out to be as big as we thought, but we will find out soon how they measure up to truly elite competition. Well, on that note, Saturday was bad all around for the Longhorns. Not only was their previously high-flying offense completely snuffed out by the dominant Dawgs, Michigan suffered the aforementioned loss to Illinois, and OU was shellacked at home by South Carolina, using both teams to drop out of the polls. Suddenly, despite all their impressive work to this point in the season, Texas is without a single ranked win and smarting from a double-digit loss at home. It’s far from the end for Steve Sarkisian’s team, who I think have still done enough to be considered one of the best in the country, but they will need to recover quickly, as they travel to a tough, ranked Vanderbilt side this weekend (and no, I still cannot believe that is a real sentence I wrote).
6. Miami
You thought a bye week would cause Miami to stop eking out instant classic wins over decent ACC foes? Ha! Think again! Just as the ‘Canes caught their breath from their back-to-back last-second wins over Virginia Tech and Cal, they emerged from their week off to travel to Louisville and got caught in a wire-to-wire gunfight. But, as they have done exclusively over the last month, Cam Ward and the Miami offense found just enough juice to get the job done against a tricky conference opponent. You get the feeling they’re flirting a little too much with danger, but hey, a 7-0 record and a Top 3 strength of record is undeniable.
7. Iowa State
Speaking of teams whose unbeaten season barely survived a challenge from an unranked opponent on their home field…yes, Iowa State remained in lock-step with conference mates BYU in more ways than one, also relying on some last-minute magic to pull out a thrilling win over UCF (who will host the Cougars next). Look, Matt Campbell’s Cyclones aren’t passing any eye tests, and frankly, after spending a weekend being extremely hospitably hosted by my dear friend Micah who’s an ardent Hawkeye, I can’t in good conscience keep ISU in the Couch Top 5. But until they lose either a game or at least their grip on a top 10 resume, they survive in the Couch Power 10 for at least another week.
8. Tennessee
ESPN actually has Tennessee outside the Top 10 in strength of record, which is bonkers to me, considering they’ve played a Top 25 schedule and have just a sole loss, by 5 points on the road. Anyways, the Vols’ thrilling win over Alabama, their second in three years, proved that lest you think the Arkansas loss and narrow escape vs. Florida were the “real Tennessee,” there’s still a damn good team under it all there. How they fare the rest of the season will come down to whether they can figure their offense out— as my friend David put it on Saturday, Nico Iamaleava flips a three-sided coin before every play and either wets himself, overthrows a receiver, or makes a Heisman-level play.
9. Indiana
The delta in schedule strength between the last two major conference unbeaten teams and the other five is great; both Indiana and Pitt still rank in the sub-100. But that doesn’t make what’s going on in Pittsburgh and especially Bloomington any less remarkable. In his first season at the helm, Curt Cignetti has turned IU into bona fide Big Ten contenders; a 1-loss Nebraska represented by far the most serious opponent they have faced thus far, and what did they do? Beat the Cornhuskers like a drum, sending them back to Omaha with a 56-7 loss. Now, the eyes of the nation are upon them with College Gameday and reigning national runners-up Washington come to town; the pressure will be on for them to deliver in the limelight, but if they can survive these next couple weeks, they will enter a season- closing stretch of reigning champions Michigan -> Big Ten favorites Ohio State -> rivals Purdue at 9-0 and Top 10 in the country.
10. Pittsburgh
Pitt had a bye week, which means, while they still have a slightly superior strength of schedule to fellow unbeaten Indiana, they didn’t have the opportunity the Hoosiers did to grab some national attention. Still, they won’t complain about the rest as this next month (visits from resplendent Syracuse and Virginia sides sandwiched around a trip to #22 SMU, and then a visit from #9 Clemson) will make or break their hopes in the ACC and playoff picture.
Just missed: Ohio State, LSU, Notre Dame, Texas A&M, Kansas State, Seth Trimble
BONUS: Couch Playoff Bracket!
*denotes conference auto-bid
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