Premier League Predictions, Week 3

Welcome back to the weekly predictions, Premier League fans! It was a wild weekend last time out, and the fun is already here again. So let's get to it!

I did alright on my first prediction slate of the 22-23 season. I, like most people, was in no way prepared for Crystal Palace's surprise draw at Liverpool, nor Brentford's stunning rout of Manchester United. But I did accurately forecast Arsenal and Manchester City's wins, as well as the draw between Chelsea and Tottenham. Not only that, but I came oh-so-close to nailing my score predictions in each of those, being just one goal off in each case. Still... something about horsehoes and hand grenades... let's not waste time sugarcoating a mediocre 3/5 week, the next matches are less than 12 hours away! Here are your 5 for Week 3!

Tottenham Hotspur vs. Wolverhampton Wanderers

It may only be Week 2, but you'll probably be hard-pressed to find a more "Conte-era" Spurs performance than their draw at Stamford Bridge last week. In a match in which they were largely outplayed in front of a hostile crowd, they fought with grit to the very end to snag a point from the death, just like they did to two of the best teams in Europe last season when they got 8 points off Manchester City and Liverpool. The competition level should go down a bit this week; in the past several years, Wolves have been a constant thorn in bigger clubs' sides, but Bruno Lage's side just hasn't been able to show the quality thus far that they've flashed in recent seasons.

The Pick: Tottenham, 2-0

Bournemouth vs. Arsenal

Arsenal came into the season with high expectations, and thus far, have not given their oft-maligned fanbase any reason for concern. They're already only one of two teams in the league to win all of their matches, confirming what we've said all along, that this title race is going to be a two-horse race between Arsenal and Manchester City. Now, the reason for caution? Compared to the other Big Six clubs, they've begun with a pretty easy slate of opponents to start the season. The reason for further optimism? That hasn't stopped them from looking good, and this next opponent is another one that they will be expected to take care of.

The Pick: Arsenal, 3-1

Leeds United vs. Chelsea

These two historic sides began the season with very different expectations, but have actually had pretty similar seasons thus far. A gritty, necessary season opening win was followed by a thrilling 2-2 draw, in which both these sides will be angry they settled for 1 point (Leeds because they led 2-0 with just a quarter of the match remaining, Chelsea because they felt hard done by the officials and conceded the equalizer with virtually the last touch of the match). Chelsea will be desperate to wash out the bad taste of the turbulent recent months, and Leeds desperate to put to rest the relegation fears and prove that they're here to stay this season. I actually expect this to be a pretty evenly-played match, but I can't not go with the talent advantage on the Blues with this one.

The Pick: Chelsea, 1-0

Newcastle vs. Manchester City

Do we have a name for this manufactured rivalry yet? The "Oil Derby"? The "Blood Money Battle"? Whatever you want to call it, the matchup between the Premier League's current dynasty and the club many think is poised to supplant them could be a cracker. Newcastle have kicked off the season with a solid, if not altogether flawless start, while Manchester City haven't seemed to lose a step since last season, thoroughly dominating both West Ham and Bournemouth. I do think the Magpies, especially at home, will represent a much sterner test for the champions than either of their previous opponents, but I'm yet to see a good reason to predict anything from City other than a win.

The Pick: Man City, 2-1

Manchester United vs. Liverpool

This will be an edition of the North West Derby unlike most before. Everything about this matchup between the two most historic clubs in England feels weird. Not only is it being played in August, far earlier than usual, it's coming at a time when neither one is in the title race at the moment. And not only that, neither team has even won a match. And not only that, one of them (United) is dead last in the League! You might think that the teams being ranked 12th and 20th would dampen the anticipation for this rivalry match, but I actually think there will be a ton of eyeballs still, if for no reason other than to see which of these clubs is going to unbelievably begin the season with 0 wins from 3 matches. There's no question United have had the worse time of it thus far, with last week's embarrassment against Brentford a new low for a team that keeps finding new lows. But considering the difference in expectations, Liverpool, a side that were two goals away from a historic quadruple just 3 months ago, have been awfully disappointing themselves, earning 2 points against the likes of Fulham and Crystal Palace. With that in mind, I swear I'm not just being a troll nor a needless pessimist, but I've gone back and forth on what's going to happen Monday night a lot, and I honestly think Manchester United will pull off the stunner.

Look, Liverpool very well could win this one 5-0 in the same manner they did last season, and I wouldn't be surprised by that at all. They're undoubtedly the better team with the better manager. But, I don't know....United has been laughably bad, but it feels flukish how bad they've been; almost as if they need something to make them wake up and actually start trying, and I feel as if a primetime showdown against their suddenly vulnerable archrivals. While Liverpool haven't been nearly as bad, their two draws haven't felt flukish. Their midfield hasn't been good enough and the attackers haven't been capitalizing on enough chances, and with Darwin Nunez's red card suspension now adding to the laundry list of injuries to Firmino, Jota, Henderson, Oxlade-Chamberlain and Keita, I just can't see that problem going away this week.

The Pick: Man United, 2-0